PURSUING PERFECTION WITHOUT GOING CRAZY

In many of the books I’ve read about leadership, there is the recurring theme of a commitment to excellence. There is a drive in effective leaders to press toward perfection in all that they do. They will not be satisfied with the organization, the staff, or themselves if excellence is not the standard mode of operation.

We know that Jesus was perfect. He was without sin. He was flawless, and He is our example, the model for our lives, and the context for our conduct. Furthermore, we know that Jesus expected that His disciples would pursue perfection in their lives as well. Jesus said, “In John 13:15, “I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” In Matthew 5:48 He said, “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” So here’s the rub, how do we achieve a healthy balance when the fact is that we are all flawed and imperfect humans who are seeking to live up to the standard of excellence set by a perfect person? Won’t this lead to frustration and failure? Doesn’t it set us up for a fall?

I was reading an article in Ministries Today Magazine (Nov./Dec. 2005) entitled, “Perfectly Unhealthy” in which author Richard Winter addressed the difference between the healthy pursuit of perfection and an unhealthy perfectionist. He said that there are two sides to perfectionism. There is the “Adaptive, positive, healthy, constructive” side, which is marked by:

• High standards—(knows what those standards are)
• Good self-esteem—(is secure in him/herself)
• Strive for excellence—(is always pressing toward the mark)
• Realistic of failures—(is not afraid to fail forward when reaching toward excellence)
• Organized—(realizes that excellence begins with the leader)
• Energy and enthusiasm—(is excited about excellence and enthuses others)

But then there is also the other side of perfectionism:

• Unrealistically high standards (for self and others)
• Low self-esteem—(never feeling good enough)
• Seek to excel at any cost—(will sacrifice relationships and/or integrity)
• Generalize failure—(if one thing fails, then everything was wrong)
• Controlling—(cannot delegate or trust others to get it right)
• Exhausted and exhausting—(is mentally and physically fatigued and causes mental and emotional fatigue in others)

Too many leaders fail to find the balance between “neurotic perfectionism” at one end of the spectrum, and “non-perfectionism” at the other. Jesus understood the predicament of humanity and while He set the mark for the prize, He was also a patient teacher and mentor to those He would eventually delegate the mission to.

Leaders who fail to find this balance live frustrated and unfulfilled lives. If they do not pursue excellence, then chances are that they will never achieve success. But if they become neurotically obsessed with perfection then nothing will ever be good enough and they will not only live anxiety plagued lives, but they will also make the lives of everyone around them miserable as well.

Jesus knew that Peter was going to deny Him but Jesus did not give up on Peter. Jesus called Peter, with all his imperfections, and then used Peter in a powerful way in building the church. Pursuing perfection or excellence is an ongoing journey, not a destination in this life. While we maintain excellence in all we do, we cannot allow the little flaws to foil the journey.

In the past I have been guilty of focusing more on what goes wrong than on what goes right. One mix-up in the power-point, one mispronounced word, one wrong note on an instrument, one squeal in the sound system, and I would be bothered for the rest of the day. I’ve come to learn that something is likely to be less than perfect during a worship service, but on this journey I no longer allow every flaw to be fatal. I take note and then later look at how we can do better next time.

Some flaws are one time anomalies which serve to point out how well things usually go. Any recurring issue needs to be address and corrected as we continue to press toward excellence. Just as it is a mistake to obsess over every miscue, it is also wrong look over problems that can and should be corrected. With a healthy perfectionist there will be an energetic and enthusiastic drive to do better next time. With an unhealthy perfectionist there will be finger pointing, fault-finding, blame gaming and shaming.

Jesus was definitely a healthy perfectionist. He lived the perfect life and set an example for us all to follow, but Jesus was also ready to work with His disciples and to pick them back up if they stumbled. Jesus called Peter to the team but Peter denied Christ in the courtyard while Jesus was standing before His accusers. Thankfully, that was not the final scene with Jesus and Peter. In John’s Gospel we see Jesus talking with Peter, giving Peter a chance to reaffirm his love for Jesus, and then re-commissioning Peter to minister to the people of God.

If we will not pursue excellence, then we will never achieve great results as a leader and we do not reflect the character of Christ. However, if we generalize every failure, succumb to defeat with every miscue, or bring unrealistic expectation to our team, then we will never achieve long-term success as a leader. Jesus challenged us to take the journey toward perfection. He gave us the example and set the mark, but we must be willing to press toward perfection even while making positive corrections to the imperfections as we go.