Dealing with Dis-Appointments

"Disappointment". . . if you look at the word it suggests that an appointment was anticipated, but it was annulled, or it was canceled. It suggests a letdown, a setback, a frustration, if not a failure. Every leader will have to face his or her share of disappointments. A leader may hope for something to happen, may anticipate a certain outcome, may even plan for and make arrangements for an “appointment” only to be dis-appointed. How a leader handles such disappointments may ultimately determine how far he or she will go in leadership.

For some, the disappointment may result in a bitter retributive spirit that seeks to get even with the individual or the organization who denied the anticipated objective. Such retribution often takes the form of disparaing remarks concerning those that the leader perceives to have thwarted his or her would-be appointment. Another reaction is to retreat into lethargy, a “what’s the use” mentality that surrenders to mediocrity and sinks into complacency. A third and more productive response to disappointment is to assess the reasons for the disappointment, make adjustments and improvements, and then refocus for the next “appointment.” It may require that one change goals, it may mean a new focus, or it may mean that one must revisit the appointment with new skills, experience, resources, or education.

It is too easy to blame others for our disappointments. However, there may not even be need for blame. It may have simply come down to the fact that someone else could deliver a better product, or could produce it at a lower cost, or that they simply appealed to some intangible attraction on the part of those making decisions relative to the appointment.

Truthfully, sometimes it isn’t fair. That’s life. A good leader will roll with the punches and get back up off the mat to fight another day. Some punches will be below the belt and sometimes you get a thumb in the eye, but wallowing in self-pity and self-justification will not gain a victory, now or later.

The Apostle Paul faced his share of disappointments, but he never quit, he never backed down or gave ground. Instead, he continued to press toward the mark until, at the end of his life he could honestly say, "I have fought a good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith." Good leaders keep the faith.